Tag Archives: bacalar mexico

A Lesson In Changing The World

1 Nov

When Lisa and I left Texas in 2013, after many years in Austin, we dreaded finding a new doctor, mechanic, dentist, plumber, etc. Today we have all those people on speed dial or rather,WhatsApp.

Last summer we needed to find a new member of the clan, an appliance guy. That’s when we met Oliver.

Always happy.

In Mexico, people fix things. If you can’t get parts, duct tape steps in. Oliver spent four days trouble shooting, ordering and replacing the motherboard and cleaning the coils of our, old by today’s standards, refrigerator. He didn’t leave until everything worked as it should. His diligence saved us a bundle.

Every day that Oliver was in our house, a pint-sized assistant named Marco was by his side. Marco is eleven. He would not talk to us, kept his head down and did not make eye contact, in spite of Lisa’s best efforts to engage him. Oliver was teaching Marco about tools and various tasks of appliance repair.

A magic bag of tricks.

In a private conversation Oliver explained that Marco refused to go to school. His mom worked all day and could not make him go. Marco can not read. It is a sad situation and Oliver was doing his best to keep the boy occupied and out of trouble.

This week we had more refrigerator problems and Oliver showed up again. Before touching the refrigerator he excitedly told us the story of Marco.

Apparently Marco has two sisters who are also struggling with school attendance. Oliver, out of his own pocket, bought the girls shoes, school clothes, backpacks and supplies. Seeing the perks, Marco meekly stepped forward to inquire if he too could get new things if he went to school. Oliver said that he sat the boy down and extracted an agreement before making the investment. Apparently Marco had been being bullied for his lack of shoes.

Oliver encouraged the mom to talk to the school about getting Marco individual help and the school agreed. All this because of a simple man who values children, education and made a decision to help.

An aside about Oliver. He was in a serious motorcycle accident a few years ago which he crawled his way out of. His body is twisted and partially disabled yet he reinvented himself by going to school to learn appliance repair. Out of his small savings for a truck he is sending three neighbor children to school. If any of you would like to donate to help, please let me know.

DOS TORTAS

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Hallelujah And Amen

30 Nov

In much of the world, a wedding is quite predictable, the dress, the rings, the cake. When we were invited to the wedding of our Mayan housekeeper Lucero, we jumped at the chance. She is from a postage stamp sized village thirty minutes from Bacalar. It was our fourth wedding in twelve years and they have run the gambit from top shelf to backyard.

Lucero’s dress was stunning and she looked very nervous, like most brides.

This wedding was on a whole different level. Ninety-some percent of Mexico is Christian with most of that Catholic. But not in this area. There are a lot of Mennonites, Jehovah’s Witnesses, Seventh Day Adventists and Pentecostals. We had never been to a Pentecostal wedding.

The first of three preachers.

The wedding started at 6pm on a Thursday. We put on our one “fancy” outfit and prayed that the thunder we heard would not spoil the occasion. The festivities started on time which was no small miracle in Mexico. It was all quite unexpected from there.

The children were adorable and looked at the strangers inquisitively.

The wedding involved standing for most of two plus hours, arms raised, and singing, amen-ing, and hallelujah-ing. Three different preachers tag-teamed to inspire, admonish, and harangue in Spanish. It would have been ok except the volume produced by half a dozen large speakers emitted a sound heard by God themself. I stuffed tissue in my ears but it did not help. We left early.

By the time we left, the seats were filled in. I think the whole town was in attendance.

I hated to leave. It meant so much to Luceto that we would come, and four old white women in a sea of about 200 brown faces did not go unnoticed. The family tried to feed us before we left but our tolerance for bleeding ears was spent.

Lots of sleepy little faces.

There are times that I admire the devotion, enthusiasm, and conviction of religion. My personal spiritual beliefs are quieter and more internal. I am grateful that everyone gets to find their own place, even if it’s not quiet or peaceful but right for them.

DOS TORTAS

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Getting To Know Mexico

19 Oct

In the 1970s in Mexico, it was quite easy to exist without a car. Buses passed regularly by every corner and first-class buses traveled from one city to the next. And it was cheap! Most people just didn’t have cars.

Even in Austin, I enjoyed using public transportation (PT). I like to people watch, and you really learn a lot about a place by mingling with people shoulder to shoulder. What better way than PT.

This week, I had to drop my car off in Chetumal, 40 minutes away for maintenance. Yes, we could have taken two cars, and Lisa could have followed and brought me home. Or I could take the colectivo. I chose the latter.

View from the back seat.

Colectivos aka taxis run back and forth between Bacalar and Chetumal. They hold four passengers squeezed together and depart only when full. The cost is about $3. I get a kick out of them. There is always AC and music blasting. They are so Mexican.

Maria de Jesus Rodriguez

This week, I met Maria, sitting next to me in the back seat. She is the head of the hotel and restaurant association of Bacalar. We yacked the whole way, and before I knew it, I was home. I love meeting random, interesting people while traveling. We exchanged numbers and plan to meet for coffee.

Riding in a colectivo.

In December we will attend our fourth Mexican wedding. They have ranged greatly in economic status. In December we will attend the small village wedding of our housekeeper. I’m really looking forward and honored to have been invited. One more way to celebrate our adopted country.

DOS TORTAS

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Always An Excuse For A Party

13 Jul

The Tortas are on our annual visit to Northern California. Our granddaughters turned seven and it was time for the pool party of the century.

The calm before the storm.
Each with their own themed cake.
Gringo taco bar included.
Grandma Lisa doing Spanish with the girls.

My poor daughter got sick and wasn’t able to attend the party. Instead, she ended up at minor emergency with early pneumonia and more antibiotics. And today we clean up.

DOS TORTAS

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Vacation Detour

3 Sep

We left Northern California for Seattle, Washington on Monday. We were on to cooler climes and a visit with friends before heading to Vancouver Canada.

My daughter and twin granddaughters.

Unfortunately things took an unexpected detour.

Lisa got sick and ended up in the hospital. A nasty UTI (urinary tract infection) which traveled to her kidneys, has her with an IV pumping antibiotics into her arm until Tuesday. So much for Vancouver. At this point we’re grateful she’s alive and healing. She was one sick puppy.

Near my hotel is an art museum with Chihuly glass.
Native artists and subject matter.
Powerful images from native artists.

It’s been a crazy week. We literally opened google maps and went to the nearest hospital. We lucked out. The doctors and staff have been amazing. We are so very grateful.

DOS TORTAS

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Damn Butterflies

23 Jul

She lived across the street from us. Terry was born in South Austin in 1933 and bought her house when she married Bill. They raised two kids there and when we met her she was a widow living alone, her adult children were long grown. Our older tree-lined neighborhood was an Austin treasure with houses built in the early 60’s. It used to be that the only way to buy a house there was when someone died. We got our house because the previous owner moved to a nursing home.

We kept an eye on all the elders in our neighborhood. Terry’s house once flooded. She had a dry creek behind her yard that turned out not to be so dry one spring downpour. Lisa built a French drain to channel the water away from her house. That was the only time she asked for help. She was an independent old coot and we loved her.

My favorite story about Terry was her love for a pink flowering vine called Queen’s Wreath that grew on the side of her house. The butterflies also loved it and gravitated to its sweet nectar. The trouble was, when the butterflies lighted on the flowers, the petals fell off. One day I came upon Terry muttering, “damn butterflies” as she shood them off her beloved flowers.

Queen’s Wreath

A neighbor found Terry unconscious in her carport one day. Her car door was open so she was clearly about to run errands. Her head was bleeding. We never saw her again. Her children whisked her away. We didn’t have a relationship with them and we got complacent. The time for Terry to make her own decisions had run out.

Some time afterward there was a flurry of activity at her place. A couch was carried to the curb. Lisa inquired and was gifted the couch. They were emptying out her house to sell it. Terry was living with her daughter.

We knew the couch was brand new. It took days of airing and scrubbing. Terry also had a big floofy white cat. We still have the couch. As a matter of fact I’m sitting on it right now. Luna gives up her spot now and then.

We left Austin September 2013.

One day I was thinking about Terry and found her obituary. It made me sad yet brought back good memories. And whenever we find ourselves complaining about some inconsequential thing, we remember “damn butterflies” and think of Terry and smile.

DOS TORTAS

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Family Reunion Time

13 Nov

Our family has been whittled down to four siblings, myself and three brothers. We are spread about and with the added delight of Covid, haven’t seen each other in six years. We will gather in a weeks time in Florida to reminisce, eat, swim, share, hangout and pass our family lore on to the next generation. I’m looking forward to it.

1981, my youngest brother Michael’s wedding. He died in 2000.

There is something about siblings. We have fought, resented, silenced, made up and reconnected as adults. I think we’ve finally made our peace and there should be no food fights.

2016 Nieces and nephews, spouses and my son at the far end. One brother missing.

So we’ll be packing up and making the trek to the US. House sitters arrive on Wednesday. Wish us safe travels.

Last picture before my mother died.
Mid 1950s

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Slow Slow Quick Quick

16 Oct

This week I was working in the kitchen and listening to 90’s Country Music. I was dancing around by myself, two stepping, spinning. Slow slow quick quick. So many of the songs brought to mind individual friends, Harper, Jean, Cori, Denise, Cindy, Trish, Betty. We danced two or three nights a week, two stepping, waltz, and line dancing. It’s where I met my wife.

That’s me, second from the left.

I came out in 1990’s in Austin, Texas. The country bar was the place to see and be seen. I quickly figured out taking dance lessons and learning to lead got the attention and the girls. I’d always been a dancer so it wasn’t that difficult. So many memories.

We had so much fun. Happy Halloween

I remember being much younger and having a neighbor in the duplex next door who listened to 60s music all day. I rolled my eyes. Ah the judgements of youth. While I don’t listen to Garth, Travis, Willie, George, Dolly or Shania all day, for an hour this week I was transported to a simpler time. Good times for this old gal.

DOS TORTAS

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Happy Anniversary – 28 Years

2 Oct

Twenty-eight years for a lesbian relationship is like a hundred years for everyone else. The bookies taking bets on us would have lost money big time.

Lisa – twelve years my junior. Former smoker, drinker, X-military. She just started college in 1994.

Me – mom to three children, still sharing a house and co-parenting with my X-husband. I just started graduate school in 1994.

Our first Valentine’s. We were so young! 1997

We met at “the bar”. For you younger folks, back in the day, gay bars were how we all met. At one time there were actually three lesbian bars in Austin, Chances, Nexus and About Time! Unfortunately they have gone the way of the very extinct dodo bird.

In 1999, we had a backyard commitment ceremony after five years and the purchase of a house. Nothing says commitment like buying a house together.

It’s all about the cake!
Sharing a private moment.

In 2015 marriage became legal in all 50 US states. We had a small ceremony and made it legal in California. In case you lost count, that gives us three anniversary dates (and two honeymoons).

Our daughter planned and executed this memorable event.

As we can barely remember what day it is, we have always celebrated the day we met, September 16, 1994. It’s been a wild ride and I wouldn’t trade it for anything.

Our recent visit to Austin. Our eldest son. 2022

DOS TORTAS

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Let’s Book A Flight

10 Apr

When we retired to Bacalar, Mexico from the United States, we took so many things into consideration. I was working a job that gave me time to spend researching. Bacalar was thirty minutes from an international airport. We would be able to travel back to the US easily for holidays and visits with family. We had direct buses to Cancun where we could get flights to anywhere in the world. There was one caveat that we didn’t consider, couldn’t have possibly known.The world of 2022 is no longer the world of 2013.

Nine short years. How time flies. I’m not suggesting that we should not make plans because of an uncertain future. The future is always uncertain.

Sitting on my couch looking at travel search engines makes my head spin. Lisa said something his morning that is so true. “You should go. When you get home you’ll never want to do it again.” How right she is. I hate flying. Flights are long (there are fewer route options), expensive and involve crazy people. I also drop my cell phone and loose my headphones. The stress makes me crazy.

I will persist however. I miss my kids. Wish me luck.

DOS TORTAS

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