Archive | June, 2013

Miracles Involve a Shift in Perspective

30 Jun

I remember the day my daughter was born. After months of indigestion, not being able to sleep (due to the gymnast residing in my belly), yeast infections, and a changed center of gravity, I went through this scary, uncertain experience called birth. I was 24 years old. It was painful and I didn’t know how long it would last, but in the end, I got the most beautiful gift…mi hija. Those were the days when you had to wait for someone to announce, “It’s a girl” or boy. After she was born, I was amazed at my body that had grown a child, birthed it into the world and was fully equipped to feed her. I had very little to do with it really, but I had faith and trust in this miraculous process.

There are times when I feel like I’m giving birth to this experience called, “moving to Mexico”. I’ve felt much less stressed this week. The house is prepped for selling and we have shown it several times. No one has backed a Brinks truck up to our door and unloaded the required bags of money (my vision). Today and every Sunday we are having an open house until it sells.

We are butterflies struggling out of the cocoon to spread our wings and fly. The struggle is itself part of the miraculous process that is required to throw off the cocoon and strengthen our wings for that migrational trip south. At times it is difficult to hang onto this enlightened perspective, the struggle is part of the process and something to be embraced with lessons of its own.

Visiting Bakersfield

Napping @Grandma’s

2011_Alex_Felice

Taking silly pics with the computer.

San Diego Tea Time

Stressing About Being Stressed

24 Jun

I detach myself from preconceived outcomes and trust that all is well.
~Anita Moorjani~

This is not the sexy part of the Adventures of Dos Tortas. Lisa got out of the hospital on Wednesday with a diagnosis of IBS (Irritible Bowel Syndrome). The combination of less than stellar eating and stress equals severe abdominal pain for her. For me it translates into chest pain and heart palpitations. This is NOT the fun part. At this point, all we can do is TRUST. We have no control, none, zilch, zippidy-doo-dah on the control. We KNOW the house will sell. We don’t know when or to whom. Our rental house is sold and closed. The FOR SALE sign on our present house is out on the curb and we’ve already had a serious looker. They’re bringing a contract. We’ll see.

If you’re considering selling all your possessions (or giving them away) and moving out of the country, here are some things I suggest:
~ Either do it by yourself or have an amazing partner who is “all in”. We have a solid relationship and by that I do not mean the absence of conflict. We have each other’s backs and are numero uno, each to the other.
~ No matter how much time you set aside to prepare, the end will be loco. There will not be enough massages, positive affirmations, meditations or meltdowns that will get you through this process unscathed. We have an incredibly supportive family and friends and that has helped so much.
~ It really helps to have a job that allows you some flexible time to search the web, write a blog or communicate with realtors. (It helps if it pays pretty well too.)
~ Be frugal…rarely eat out, invest in your future, be driven and committed. I mentioned it before, but the book YOUR MONEY OR YOUR LIFE (Robin & Dominguez), played a big part in getting me to this place.
~ Even if you would NEVER sell all your posessions and move out of the country, start today downsizing, simplifying, and being more frugal. All this STUFF takes up a lot of life energy. It must be bought, maintained, stored, disposed of, passed down, cleaned, and organized by you or someone after you’re gone.

Pictures of our house.
There’s also a detailed description on Austin Craig’s List that I posted last night. Please pass this information on to your friends. Maybe their dream is to chuck it all and move to Austin.

Sunset Lake Bacalar

Sunset Lake Bacalar

A Sidebar

16 Jun

The Tortas were off on an adventure of a different sort this past weekend. Lisa was hospitalized for some tests to discover the source of a nagging abdominal pain turned severe. It’s been going on for quite sometime, but as she is a disabled veteran without health insurance (not able to be on my health insurance since we cannot legally marry) the wheels turn very slowly at the Veterans Administration. That being said, my planned blog will be postponed for now. I cannot close without saying that veterans deserve better medical treatment than they are getting. I viewed a hospital that is understaffed and without infrastructure to handle it’s patient load. This problem started last September and has taken this long due to delays of crucial tests. Finally showing up at the ER on Friday took 9 hours and repeated demands for pain medication. But we are optimistic and very grateful to the kind staff that are keeping her comfortable until we can figure out what is causing this problem. Please keep us in your thoughts and prayers. Until next week dear readers.

If Men Wore Skirts

9 Jun

Can you imagine going to work, or to the grocery store or church and seeing men wearing skirts? Now imagine how our world would have to change for skirt-wearing men to be the norm. There would be gender equality and a balance of power? Pink and blue beanies would not be the uniform at birth? A lot would have to change in our country to see men comfortable enough to wear skirts.

The change going on in OUR lives isn’t quite as dramatic, but sometimes it feels like it is. We are letting go of all things familiar, jobs, family, neighbors, friends, a home of almost 18 years in a city where I’ve lived since I was 22 years old. I am getting rid of the old, the borrowed and the blue. And I wonder why I feel tense. One week I blog about being fearless and the next, about being stressed out. Arghhhhhhhh.

Because I am committed to honesty I tell you that this is NOT easy. Even though we both want it, have planned it, are excited about the move and the life that we are going to, my body somehow resists. I have been to the doctor who told me that my heart and BP are fine. I meditate, exercise, eat well and get enough sleep. Am I scared? I can’t imagine of what. We have no deadlines really. Things will work out fine however they do. “This too shall pass” is my mantra. I also tell myself that feeling this pressure in my chest is NOT a character flaw. I cannot control the anxiety I feel as much as I want to argue with my body that, “this doesn’t make sense!!” It is what it is and sharing my experience with you helps relieve the pressure. I don’t KNOW it all and I don’t want to appear as if I’ve got it all figured out, because I DON’T. There is a message here that I want to be open to. Perhaps if I do more listening than talking I will hear what it is. This last thought only came to me as I wrote it now. So I get to be fearless in listening to my body. I’ll let you know how that goes.

Enjoying a Sunny Lake Bacalar Day

Enjoying a Sunny Lake Bacalar Day

My Daughter's Wedding 5/13

My Daughter’s Wedding 5/13

Marry Me

2 Jun

In the middle of planning our escape to Mexico, my daughter was planning a wedding…..and what a beautiful wedding it turned out to be. I arrived last Monday to northern California wine country to assist with the decorating, staging, hand-holding and oooing and aaahing. There was much hugging, kissing and eating, LOTS of eating. I had nails painted, hair fluffed and makeup applied. I also squeezed into underwear two sizes too small that I was too cheap to replace.

The weekend was the coming together of a large, diverse family, four moms, three dads, nine siblings and their spouses, assorted cousins and children. We got to know each other and fell in love with our beauty, willingness to work together and our mutual love for these children who love each other.

The toast I shared at the rehearsal dinner:

Felice and Doug – May 31, 2013
November 18th, we got the call
He went down on one knee! 

She said “yes”, next came the text,

Of a ring selected perfectly.
Now when’s the date?
We can’t wait till summer,

The sooner the better,

No one’s getting any younger.
May 31st it is,

Not that far away,
Save the dates, invitations, wedding showers & a gown without delay.
Families and friends said yes,

As the wedsite counted down,

OMG is this fun?
The flowers, the cake, the lights and the rings,

The dancing and rituals, “I hope no one sings!”
Doug and Felice – a toast to your day,

Before the honeymoon provides a much needed get-away.
The start of a new family,
No one could be prouder than we your parentals,

Tricia & Jerry, Steve & Terry, Max and Lisa and most of all me.

Escorting my daughter on her wedding day.

Escorting my Daughter on her wedding day.

2013 wedding lineup

Jumping for Joy

Jumping for Joy


2013 Engagement

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