Feminine Spirit Guadalupe

10 Dec

December 12 is the feast of the Virgin of Guadalupe. She is such an important Mexican icon, that she gets a bank holiday. For me, she is the feminine expression of God. I was raised Catholic and walked away from that dogma in high school. Somehow I have found a way back.

2018 with Lisa and Frida
This work of art has a predominant place in our house and in our hearts.

As I have aged, I have found my way to a less intellectual God and more to a heartfelt appreciation for creation. Guadalupe is my sister, friend and mother. Her presence adorns my house in every room.

A gift from my sister-in-law who died of Covid. We had this niche created for her when we built our house.

I am reminded of her holiday by the presence of the Guadalupanas (pilgrims) along the highway. They mostly ride bicycles adorned with her image and the red, white and green of the Mexican flag. They ride in clusters with matching shirts, often in sandals. Sometimes there is a support vehicle, sometimes not. I’m not sure of their destination, perhaps Tulum which is two hours by automobile.

Tulum

I wonder what the pilgrims’ stories are. Is their motivation a petition or gratitude for a prayer answered? The site of her original apparition is outside of Mexico City. We visited in 2017. Twenty million visit annually with nine million around December 12, her feast day.

Both the new basilica on the right and the older on the left. Mexico City in the background. Lisa and I are standing on the site of the original apparition.
Grotto in front of our house.

DOS TORTAS

This week is the anniversary of my dear Aunt Irene’s death. She was 100 and devout Catholic. Guadalupe surely welcomed her with open arms.

Both my aunt and uncle lived to 100.

We Have Guests!

3 Dec

The year was 2019. You remember 2019, back before the word Covid ever crossed our lips or took up real estate in our brains. Lisa and I went on an epic trip, Miami to Los Angeles through the Panama Canal. While breakfasting on the back deck of the Azamara cruise ship we met Dan and Lisa. Breakfast turned into friendship and we’ve kept in touch ever since.

Panama City off in the distance.

On the cruise, Dan and Lisa looked at pictures of Bacalar and oood and aaahd appropriately and declared that they would come visit. Given our past experience with guests, we gave each other “the look” and wink, wink and said, sure, we’d love to have you.

Staying in Playa del Carmen on our way to Bacalar.

Four years later, they’re here and I can’t believe it. We have a week of show and tell planned. There’s a boat tour of the laguna tomorrow, pyramids, the pirate fort and of course mercados and downtown. For now they’re content with sitting on the roof and taking in the view.

A jungle welcome for guests.

Can you tell we’re excited!

DOS TORTAS

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Magical Valladolid MX

25 Nov

We first visited Valladolid in 2014. Time sure does fly. This week I wanted a little getaway and made the four hour drive. Valladolid is in the heart of the Yucatán and was the center of Mayan resistance during the mid 1800’s. These wirey small people fought off the federal government, Spanish, US and pirates with machetes. I gotta give them props.

I love Villadolid’s zocalo (town square), regal cathedral and stately convent. There is a busy mercado, several cenotes (natural pools) and world class pyramids of Ek Balam and Chichen Itza.

Franciscan Convent of San Bernardino, a favorite place for locals.
1545 San Servacio Cathedral

Having been to Valladolid several times, I wasn’t there to join the throngs of tourists but to wander the streets, eat good food and sketch.

Maybe the best veggie burger ever! #yerbabuena
French toast, vegan tacos, capuchino and waffles. All yummy.
While waiting for my breakfast.

I also visited the Casa de Los Venados, House of the Deer. The private 18,000 square foot home/museum of the US art collectors and philanthropists John and Dorianne Venator. This was my third visit. There aren’t sufficient words to describe the gift that the Venators have given to Mexico and the world. There are over 3,000 folk art pieces owned by private citizens.

My first attempt at a slide show!

After three days I was ready to come home to Bacalar. As we head into the holidays, take time to appreciate the beauty that surrounds and the people you love. I appreciate the comments left by readers. Thank you for hanging with me and sharing this bumpy ride called life.

DOS TORTAS

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Do I Really Want Friends?

19 Nov

Last week we celebrated the Hindu festival of Diwali around a communal table with people we had just met. I tell myself and whoever will listen that I want more people in my life ie friends. Most of the legacy people that we met in Bacalar when we arrived ten years ago, have aged out, sold their homes and moved on. The community that we thought we were moving into, disintegrated like crumbling Mayan pyramids.

Mayan mask.

I sat at dinner last Saturday between two men. They each sat with their body turned away from me talking to the person on the opposite side. This behavior is something that I’m used to. I find that I am invisible to most men. As an old woman (71), men rarely give me the time of day. As a lesbian too, I do not flirt or dress to please. I’ve given up that game a long time ago.

My attempt at a costume for Diwali.

And then something surprising happened. Terry, to my left, began to engage with me. The man HE had been talking to was flirting with the women at the other end of the table. That left me. We talked, Mayan Train, health, family and diet. He did some mansplaining about things that I was quite knowledgeable about, so I listened.

Jey our chef extraordinaire. Me second on the right.

The evening was enjoyable, although I learned something about myself. I really don’t do well in crowds, even small ones. I disengage or talk to one person at a time. In the past, I’ve made the decision to get to know someone by really going after them, a brunch date or an invitation to our house. And like anything else, sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn’t. I’m about 25% success rate.

Covid allowed me to be a hermit and my friendship muscles have atrophied. I have a gym acquaintance who owns a restaurant in Bacalar and who is willing to host a monthly expat gathering. I’m going to get the word out on social media. We will start in the new year. For me the personal stretch of those underutilized friendship muscles will be to show up and engage. And just maybe I will find a new friend.

DOS TORTAS

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The Celebration Of Light

11 Nov

Thanks to Bacalar local and chef extraordinaire Jey Mazumder, Lisa and I had an opportunity to celebrate the Hindu festival of Diwali and partake of an Indian feast among new friends.

A fun time was had by all.

“What is Diwali, the Festival of Lights, and how is it celebrated in India and the diaspora? Diwali is the most important festival of the year in India — and for Hindus in particular. It is celebrated across faiths by more than a billion people in the world’s most populous nation and the diaspora.” Google

Diwali is celebrated differently around the world. It usually lasts a few days and involves house cleaning, lighting candles, and the Goddess of wealth, Lakshmi. In Bacalar we celebrated by eating.

We did not win the costume contest.
The vista for our evening.

It had been raining all day and we appreciated the break to feast and dodge mosquitoes. Happy Diwali to all.

DOS TORTAS

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Going Batty In Bacalar

5 Nov

Austin, Texas USA is the home of the largest urban bat colony in the world. I’m not sure how anyone knows. Maybe the count wings and divide by two?

I have witnessed this phenomenon many times and it is truly spectacular.

When I lived in Austin in the 1970’s the free-tailed bats that migrated from Mexico in the spring to have their babies, were thought to be pests. Then someone said, “we could make money!” and they became a tourist attraction and the subject of festivals, swag and even a hockey team.

Yes, there’s a hockey team in Austin, Texas.

Bats eat three times their weight a night in mosquitoes and agricultural pests. They are also great pollinators and an essential part of the ecosystem. My dad loved bats and I was raised with a healthy respect. My mother on the other hand was over the top terrified of them .

Austin now loves all things batty.

While living in Austin we put up a bat house to invite occupancy. I never saw signs of any tenants. However, here in Bacalar, we have residents in the palapa directly outside our front door. You’d think I’d be thrilled. Mmmm not so much.

Evidence of our uninvited guests.

The bats forage at night and sleep all day. They also poop down the side of our house and on the pathway below. I tried some clever discouragement but they laughed in my face.

Wind chimes and things glittery. No deterrent.
Out little upside down tenant.

I don’t want them to leave, just live somewhere else. They seem quite intent on staying however and I think we’re going to have to make peace with it. Kind of like the rest of life don’t you think?

DOS TORTAS

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Just A Quiet Week

28 Oct

The weather has cooled off in the jungle of southern Mexico. The nights are pleasant with no need for air conditioning. We even had some rain which was sorely needed. It is the beginning of the time of year that we anticipate all summer. It reminds us why we live here in a hot, humid jungle.

Our first visit to Bacalar was in December 2012. We stood in the laguna at 12:12pm on 12-12-12 and made the decision to buy the property, upend our lives and move to a small sleepy village on the most beautiful lake in the world, Laguna Bacalar. We were so naïve.

Pictures I took on our first visit in 2012

Not in a million years could we have foreseen the changes that have come to this part of Mexico. Every time I try to take pictures of the devastation wrought by the Mayan Train (Tren Maya) I get too upset. We took a ride on Friday out to where the Bacalar station is under construction. The train will pass on the far side of the highway a few miles from our house.

Home sweet home.

Imagine 76,300 square miles (197,600 square km) of pristine jungle dissected by enormous swaths of train ways. The cost of the project is at 15 billon dollars, seventy percent over budget. Many indigenous and environmental groups have sought to halt construction to no avail. The destruction of the fragile environment, native Mayan villages and archaeological treasures is a crime.

Financed by tourist dollars I have little hope that the train will bring a better life to Yucatecans. Surely there are better ways to improve healthcare and education and provide jobs. Locals that I have spoken with have mixed feelings. They like the job opportunities but fear for the environment. As a wealthy white woman I guess I have no say and no room to complain. As a world citizen I feel helpless to stop this disaster. That horse is out of the barn.

DOS TORTAS

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If You Can’t Find It You Don’t Need It

22 Oct

Privilege afforded by gender identity, skin color, age, nationality, income, religion and a host of other things is often very hard to identify, at least for the recipient of said benefits. When society gives us an advantage that others do not have it can be quite invisible to us.

The privilege that became evident to me this week that I am without is ingredients. Many delicious plant-based recipes show up on my Instagram feed but when I look closer, I can’t get the ingredients! No vegan butter, cornstarch, molasses and a slew of other things. Yes, yes, I realize that I can fiddle and probably come up with a passable facsimile, but more and more, I roll my eyes and just give up.

The options are staggering.

I think the thing that annoys me the most is the blasé attitude of the internet chef espousing the simplicity of the recipe, as if we all had Whole Foods next store.

When we lived in Austin, there was a large high-end grocery store an easy walk away. I could be making any recipe and hop on over for a missing ingredient. No food desert in my neighborhood.

The medley of apples alone at Central Market in Austin blew my mind.

Here in the Mexican wilds we are getting a larger variety of options than were available in years gone by. What you can’t find in the supermercado can often be ordered online. I have a friend who has the right attitude, IMHO, “If you can’t find it, you don’t need it.” I think that having a simpler life is really the privilege we might all aspire to.

DOS TORTAS

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Trying To Scam The Wrong Person

15 Oct

Lisa drove this week to Cancun to pick up her aunt from the airport. As many folks do, she stopped at the large La Gas station exiting Tulum on her return to Bacalar. This particular gas station is always busy with long lines and many trucks. There isn’t another gas station for many kilometers.

Stock photo.

Lisa pulled the car in and when the tank was full, handed the attendant two 500 peso bills plus 100, about $56US. In Mexico one is not allowed to pump their own gas. I actually quite like not having to get out of the car. Her change would have been 80 pesos.

The attendant returned and claimed that Lisa only gave him one 500 peso bill. Hahaha he didn’t know it but he was trying to scam the WRONG person. Lisa immediately told him that she in fact gave him the correct amount. She called him a mentiroso liar and demanded loudly to speak with his boss.

I can only imagine the ruckus since I wasn’t along. Lisa’s Spanish pronunciation may have been a bit off, but her confidence was certain and I’m sure he knew exactly what she was saying. He quickly returned with her correct change and even had the temerity to ask for his propina tip.

It is customary to tip the attendant if they go all out, washing the windshield and checking the tire pressure. Lisa only laughed at his cajones and skeedadled.

Lisa and me in Teotihuacan 2017

I’m not saying that you won’t get scammed in your own country, but unfamiliar foreign currency and insufficient language skills can leave you vulnerable when traveling. Scammers beware however when hurricane Lisa comes to town haha.

DOS TORTAS

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Fall From Grace

8 Oct

My mother-in-law fell this week. To a degree I blame myself. Our car had been in the shop for ten days and we were beginning to run out of fresh food. Shopping list in hand, I called my taxi friend Franklin to meet us on the highway. Alice badly wanted to go and pick up some things, but mostly she was bored and wanted to get out of the house.

Christmas a few years ago.

The short walk from our house to meet the taxi required skirting puddles due to recent intermittent showers. Our road is made from layers of sascab or decomposed limestone which is slick as snot after the rain. I was doing my best to walk along the outer dry edge and expected Alice to follow me. I should have been holding onto her. Then I heard an oomph.

Falling is so hard, literally and figuratively. I should know, I’ve done it enough. My first thought was to take her home. Once on her feet, Alice vehemently declared herself to be “OK”. I knew better, but wanted to avoid an argument. She can be quiet stubborn and vocal about getting her way.

2017 Three hotties.

At the grocery store she insisted on carrying her own heavy groceries until I put my foot down. Still she insisted that she was fine. The next day told a different story.

Last April at a friend’s wedding. The many faces of Alice.

Alice didn’t break anything but there was definitely pain, bruising and regrets, both mine and hers. The end result, was an honest and vulnerable conversation about aging. Alice admitted to something we all experience, feeling younger and more capable than she is. She will be eighty in February. While some people are running marathons at eighty, Alice is not one of them. She is rather frail, as much as she prefers to believe otherwise.

We had a very honest talk. It is so easy to believe the messages that growing old equals worthlessness and being a burden. We begin to loose control as others make decisions for us, something no one likes.

Last summer’s gym rat.

Alice and I came to an agreement. When it comes to matters of health or injury, she will trust that Lisa and I have her best interest at heart. There will be no more arguments or fussing. This is a dance we all get to do. For me it’s important not to get scared but take one day at a time, keep the lines of communication open and most importantly, come from a place of love. We’ll all get through it together.

DOS TORTAS

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