Archive | October, 2025

The Unexpected We Should Expect

26 Oct

If we do not see someone or talk to them in thirty years can we  still consider them a good friend? Are comments and posts on Facebook enough? Somehow I imagined running into him in a coffee shop and picking up the conversation where we left off. Memories, shared history and familiarity would bring us up to date. Where did the time go?

This week I lost that opportunity. Gareth found out two months ago that he had gallbladder cancer. It’s one of those nasty cancers that by the time you find out, it’s too late. It hit me like a punch in the stomach. I can’t imagine what it did to his wife and son.

I went to Gareth and Wendy’s wedding in 1983. My son was days old when I wrapped us both in a blanket and ventured out. It was April and one of those Texas spring days with the sun out and a blustery wind. It was a beautiful outdoor wedding in the Texas Hill Country

I called a mutual friend this week to make sure she knew of his passing . She reminisced of a road trip they took, camping along the way. “I had such a crush on him.” I think we all did.

A friend wrote on his FB page, “If I was told that as of yesterday there were no more mountains on earth, I think it would feel the way I feel hearing there is no more Gareth. It’s simply impossible. I love that guy. ❤️.” What a lovely sentiment.

His page is filling up with stories, sadness, and shock. He was such a dear person.

My “old” friend Gareth.

One more reason to be grateful for another day on this spinning rock. Farewell and adiós Gareth. To have been so loved is a life well lived. And we did not expect it.

DOS TORTAS

Getting To Know Mexico

19 Oct

In the 1970s in Mexico, it was quite easy to exist without a car. Buses passed regularly by every corner and first-class buses traveled from one city to the next. And it was cheap! Most people just didn’t have cars.

Even in Austin, I enjoyed using public transportation (PT). I like to people watch, and you really learn a lot about a place by mingling with people shoulder to shoulder. What better way than PT.

This week, I had to drop my car off in Chetumal, 40 minutes away for maintenance. Yes, we could have taken two cars, and Lisa could have followed and brought me home. Or I could take the colectivo. I chose the latter.

View from the back seat.

Colectivos aka taxis run back and forth between Bacalar and Chetumal. They hold four passengers squeezed together and depart only when full. The cost is about $3. I get a kick out of them. There is always AC and music blasting. They are so Mexican.

Maria de Jesus Rodriguez

This week, I met Maria, sitting next to me in the back seat. She is the head of the hotel and restaurant association of Bacalar. We yacked the whole way, and before I knew it, I was home. I love meeting random, interesting people while traveling. We exchanged numbers and plan to meet for coffee.

Riding in a colectivo.

In December we will attend our fourth Mexican wedding. They have ranged greatly in economic status. In December we will attend the small village wedding of our housekeeper. I’m really looking forward and honored to have been invited. One more way to celebrate our adopted country.

DOS TORTAS

Sharing The Story Within Us

12 Oct

“Aging is not for the weak. One day you wake up and realize that your youth is gone, but along with it, so go insecurity, haste, and the need to please… You learn to walk more slowly, but with greater certainty. You say goodbye without fear, and you cherish those who stay. Aging means letting go, it means accepting, it means discovering that beauty was never in our skin… but in the story we carry inside us.” Meryl Streep.

Beauty in the hood.

Almost thirteen years ago, I began this blog to shine a light for others who might like to follow and to let my family and friends know what we were up to on this adventure of living in Mexico. Little did I know how things would change.

You Tube, Instagram, Ticktock and god knows what else are overflowing with stories of people who have self deported. Much like we did, they sold everything, scooped up their families and relocated to an unfamiliar culture, language and environment.

More beauty.

Many are trying to romanticize it all. While I love Mexico, the struggle is real. At least we left by choice.

Our blog has evolved from the Adventures of Dos Tortas to the Aging of Dos Tortas. We are in as unfamiliar a territory as the deportees.

Some days I wonder why I continue to write. I guess I do it for me. My parents and grandparents certainly didn’t prepare me for my seventies. Our experiences are all different but maybe we can be there for each other just a little, and share the story we carry inside us.

DOS TORTAS

Making Dreams Come True

5 Oct

Years ago when I was trying to find myself as a newly minted “baby” dyke, I attended numerous women’s only events. The Michigan Women’s Music Festival blew my mind as I spent a week camping with a few thousand women in the woods of northern Michigan. Sisters were doin’ it for themselves, and I was agog.

View of the main stage.

Locally in Austin we had weekend gatherings that I eagerly participated in. At one retreat I recall joining in for an opportunity to let my mind wander and imagine the life I’d like to create. Eyes closed we were led through a dreamlike visualization process. I came away with a clear vision of living in a community of women. I saw myself wrapped in a towel able to walk to swim. Swimming has always been important to me and a big contributing factor to picking Bacalar and this beautiful Laguna. This week I was up early and capturing the sunrise that is particularly lovely this time of year. Enjoy.

Up before dawn.
Do you feel the heat from that sun?
Such expressive clouds.
Practicing my stroke.

DOS TORTAS

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