I Want To See You Be Brave

12 Jun

As we plan our upcoming July trip to the US to attend to some long overdue medical issues, I find myself awash in fear and sadness. The reports of surging Covid leave me wanting to chuck it all and pull the covers over my head.

I found this timely reminder on Facebook this morning…

In times of trouble, carry on small steps.
Do what you have to do, but a little at a time.
Don’t think about the future, not even about what could happen tomorrow. Wash the dishes.
Remove the dust.
Write a letter.
Make some soup.
Do you see that?
You are moving forward step by step.
Take a step and stop.
Get some rest.
Compliment yourself.
Take another step.
Then another one.
You won’t notice, but your steps will get bigger and bigger.
Time will come when you can think about the future without crying. ❤️

(Elena Mikhalkova, ′′ The Room of Ancient Keys ′′)

We have arranged house sitters and bought airplane tickets. I am working on transportation and housing. One step, one day, one action at a time.

We learned this week of another dear friend whom we saw and hung out with in Austin pre-Covid, is in hospice. She has a neurological illness that the doctors can’t figure out. She was next on my list of friends to ask for space in her spare bedroom. Some days there just are no words.

On Wednesdays I make myself go to my drawing group. It is a brief foray out of the house, that provides social interaction and a break from the sadness. Plus I get to draw naked people! I can see the improvement in my drawing. It’s the little things, the small steps.

Lisa got her second shot. We are now both fully vaccinated. Another step.

Brave by Sara Bareilles is my new theme song. Today’s blog is me being brave, refusing to push down my tears and sadness. One thing Covid has done is bring to light people’s mental health struggles. How could we NOT be sad. I would love to hear from you. We will sit and hold hands together. Small steps.


10 Responses to “I Want To See You Be Brave”

  1. Karen Hodgens June 13, 2021 at 11:23 am #

    Sorry about your friend. Seems the older we get, the more friends we lose. I haven’t heard about surges in Covid, maybe because I live in Virginia. I’m sad, yes, because of the crazy situation with QAnon, conspiracy theorists, attacks here in Virginia on LGBTQ people by supposed “Christians” and the list goes on. Add to that–have hardly spoken to my son since he called before the election to tell me that I must not vote for Biden because he was a socialist and would destroy the country (or some such nonsense), leaving me with the idea that he is a Trumper. It’s horrifying. Feeling a weight that I thought would leave after the election, but unfortunately not. It’s a hell of a way to spend my older years. This country never was equal for everybody and too many white people clinging to the ways that have always worked for Them, not people of color.

    Liked by 1 person

    • afish25 June 13, 2021 at 12:20 pm #

      I will sit w you and hold your hand and we can be sad together.


  2. Gail Beyrle June 13, 2021 at 1:58 pm #

    Love “The boy, the mole, the fox and the horse”. Enjoy your trip.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Kim Relph June 13, 2021 at 6:03 pm #

    Alex, I share your sadness. We have suffered loss of friends and family during this time. My oldest sister passed 2 weeks ago. She lived in a memory care facility. However, things are really looking up in Austin, covid wise. Travis County is 70% fully vaccinated and new cases are almost non-existent. We see the light but will never forget this most strange time. Wish we had room to put y’all up, but we don’t right now. If you have a get together in Austin, please let me know. Email is sirgunkaur@austin.rr.com Would be great to see you!

    Liked by 1 person

    • afish25 June 14, 2021 at 8:05 am #

      Would love to see you. You are definitely added to our list!


    • afish25 July 22, 2021 at 7:18 am #

      Austin get together Miguel’s 10201 Jollyville Rd Aug 5 5:30


  4. rudeinnewyork June 14, 2021 at 6:58 am #

    If you’re headed to Texus for medical care i would be very cautious. NY is nearing 70% and among seniors near 100%. A couple weeks ago 70% of new infections were under 40 years of age.


    • afish25 June 14, 2021 at 7:16 am #

      What is 70%? We are both vaccinated and cautious.


  5. Emilie Vardaman June 14, 2021 at 7:31 am #

    Sorry about your friend. We are of the age our friends are disappearing.
    However, go up to the US and do what you need to do and then you will be able to retreat to your wonderful resort home. Wish I were there to be the one to housesit for you!

    Liked by 1 person

    • afish25 June 14, 2021 at 7:37 am #

      That would be lovely. You are welcome for a visit.


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