Archive | December, 2025

A Visit From The Ghost Of Christmas Past

25 Dec

I have been quite sick this past week, and something in the fistful of pills I’ve been taking is causing me to have nightmares. Not the stabbing scarey type but, well, last night was the sad, nostalgic kind that woke me in tears.

When snow was fun!

When did I come to hate Christmas? Once upon a time, my Dad would wait until us five kids were all nestled and snug in our beds, to turn our living room into a Christmas wonderland. He stayed up all night, putting up the tree, assembling bicycles, and stuffing the stockings. Wide-eyed, we truly believed that Santa had come.

Once upon a time.

I remember in high school, turning out the lights in our library, (I use the term loosely) and bathing in the glow of blue lights reflecting off the tinsel, and listening to Nat King Cole, Johnny Mathis and Andy Williams. Thank you (NOT) Ghost of Christmas past for stirring up long forgotten memories.

As our own children grew, the scene changed. I can see us in the kitchen, laughing, cooking and recreating my favorite holiday treats, dates stuffed with walnuts and rolled in powered sugar, celery stuffed with cream cheese. I guess we did a lot of stuffing, mostly our faces.

Our children in Mall Santa fotos.

Over time I began to resent the shopping, wrapping and hunting for the perfect gift. The lines at stores, endless traffic, jammed parking lots, and general over consumption. I declared, “no more gift giving!” I’d had enough.

My first Christmas gift from Lisa (1994) A “coupon ” book of dreams.

Moving to Mexico definitely lifted the stress, but I’m afraid the trees, music and holiday everything have crept in even here. My mother-in-law usually wants gifts and for us to put up her tiny plastic tree. This year we’ve all been sick and she doesn’t even care about that.

So there are no decorations, music or signs of Christmas at all. For the most part, I’m fine with it, but I wish the Ghost would leave me alone!

And in the words of Tiny Tim, “God bless us everyone.”

DOS TORTAS

The Year My Uncle Spiked The Eggnog

21 Dec

Making eggnog is a true labor of love. Separate the eggs and whip the whites until they form perfect peaks. Beating egg whites was always accompanied by the story of how my grandmother used to achieve perfection using only a fork and willpower. Her forearm must have rivaled an Olympic weightlifter.

Nan on her 81st birthday wearing a wig because she hated her thinning hair. She lived just shy of 95.

Next came the heavy cream, again beat into submission. Vanilla, nutmeg, all came together in Mom’s glass punch bowl, only used for the heavenly concoction.

My grandfather who asked us to call him Uncle Ed so his coworkers wouldn’t know he was a grandfather.

Christmas dinner brought family together. My grandmother and Jewish grandfather were long divorced, but that didn’t keep them from both showing up. My grandfather’s sister, Aunt Tillie was a favorite guest as well. Uncle Jack made a foursome and the folding table was brought out for a raucous game of poker, complete with trash talk and accusations of cheating.

Uncle Jack lived to be 100. His daily drink of Jack Daniel’s never slowed him down.

Mom proudly presented the “perfectly chilled” eggnog, high cholesterol in a glass. When no one was looking, my dear uncle brought out his flask and dumped the contents into the eggnog. Of course this meant that the children could not partake, not to mention that neither of my parents drank.

Mom and I dancing in my kitchen.

I’ve never seen my mother so angry, and that’s saying something. Lightening was flashing from her eyes. I think if she could have gotten away with it, there would have been a Christmas Murder that year. Ah, siblings.

I invite you to whip up this delectable treat. Feel free to empty your flask, but only in your own glass, please. You’ll never drink store-bought again.

DOS TORTAS

Lots of “folding” creates heaven in a glass.

Hard To Believe It’s been Twenty-five Years

14 Dec

When writing about siblings last week, I remembered that this week is the twenty-fifth anniversary of my brother’s death from brain cancer. I thought I’d repost a blog I wrote earlier this year and take a week off.

Still miss you every day Michael.

https://theadventuresofdostortas.com/?s=Michael&submit=Search

DOS TORTAS

The Trials And Tribulations Of Siblings

7 Dec

I am reading the book, Hello Beautiful by Ann Napolitano. It’s the story of four sisters, their individual personalities and how their close and connected lives fall apart due to death and questionable decisions. It has me thinking about my four brothers and where we’ve ended up as adults.

My oldest brother once told me that the worst day of his life was the day I was born. Nine years older than me, he was the fair-haired solo grandson and center of my parent’s universe. As the only girl and eldest of the next four children born in six years, the blame fell to me. He taught me about sexism, refusing to include me in the rough-housing because I was a “girl.” I adored him. He came for a visit to Bacalar in December 2023. Since then we talk every few weeks and enjoy long conversations.

2023 Bacalar

My next brother and I were always tight. We had special names for each other when we were little, Boody and Sany. My mother used to say that she held us, one under each arm to go to the bathroom. We were eighteen months apart. Today we talk every weekend like clockwork and he is my best friend and confidant. I’m not sure how he got to be so smart but I greatly appreciate his calm demeanor, insights and advice.

A year apart in high school.

Brother number three and I haven’t spoken in a year. When I had my accident last September (2024), he called both Lisa and me multiple times a week, to check on my condition and progress. I felt cared for. That all changed with a world-exploding US presidential election in November 2024. We were on opposite sides of the aisle which left me in shock. Many families deal with political differences by simply not talking about them. We’ve butt heads too many times and this was the proverbial straw.

Don’t I look happy?

And my youngest brother, who I was very close to, died in 2000 of a brain tumor. His daughter is now in my life and I feel blessed to have her.

Frozen in time. 1958-2000
Undiagnosed brain cancer. The world changed a few days later.

I haven’t finished the book but I’m hoping that the sisters work out their differences. For me, three out of four connections aren’t bad. I don’t hold out hope that brother number three and I will work things out. And don’t give me that, “but you’re family”. Some things blood doesn’t seem to be able to heal.

DOS TORTAS

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