It Pays To Have A Daughter

9 Oct

I read recently that having a daughter adds years to your life. Having one who is a social worker by trade is undoubtedly another bonus.

2015

While visiting California this summer, my eldest initiated the uncomfortable conversation, “Mom, what do you want at the end of your life?”. I, who am rarely at a loss for words didn’t have an answer. I guess somehow I imagined living into old age with my faculties in tact and one day just not waking up? Ha, a fantasy at best, although I imagine it could happen. Truth be told, I hadn’t imagined anything.

Reading stories.

My daughter used to work in an emergency room where families brought in their elders after a fall, stroke or other catastrophic event. When asked how they and their loved one would like to proceed, she was met with blank stares. We are all woefully unprepared. There are so many things our society ignores. We will all be there someday. Best get on it. We need to have a plan, at least a conversation.

This book should be required reading by all humans.

I have on occasion suggested books on Dos Tortas. One that addresses this sticky topic and should be required reading for everyone is, BEING MORTAL by Atul Gawande. Whether you need a framework to talk to a parent, family member or significant other, this is it. Do it now.

DOS TORTAS

10 Responses to “It Pays To Have A Daughter”

  1. Mary Ellen Heath October 10, 2021 at 8:48 am #

    Thank you Alex. Just put this on my reader. .

    Liked by 1 person

    • afish25 October 10, 2021 at 9:19 am #

      I found the book hopeful and inspirational. Let me know what you think.

      Like

  2. Nancy Day October 10, 2021 at 9:07 am #

    So beautiful. Once I planned a playlist should I be comatose and on my way to the next stage of spirit, but I couldn’t decide on which music I love best. And I love the Ram Dass quote. Thank you. Your photos are pure love. Nancy

    On Sun, Oct 10, 2021 at 7:49 AM the adventures of dos tortas wrote:

    > afish25 posted: ” I read recently that having a daughter adds years to > your life. Having one who is a social worker by trade is undoubtedly > another bonus. 2015 While visiting California this summer, my eldest > initiated the uncomfortable conversation, “Mom, what do y” >

    Liked by 1 person

    • afish25 October 10, 2021 at 9:21 am #

      We will be back in Austin for Lisa’s surgery on the 25th. Would love to see you.

      Like

  3. melissastutler October 10, 2021 at 9:59 am #

    My experience with walking Dad home was difficult. He had no plans in place except financial plans. I was left asking him when he was in serious decline if he was ready to go and if he wanted me to take care of everything. I found out later that he probably would have preferred a burial to cremation. Even though, half the time, I didn’t know what I was doing, I did have some great advisers at the assisted living and with hospice. This was one of the many things I wished I had spoken with Dad about years before.

    Liked by 1 person

    • afish25 October 10, 2021 at 10:02 am #

      Which is exactly the point of the book. None of us know what we’re doing. We learn the hard way and make peace with our decisions. Smart to get help.

      Like

  4. Jack Scott October 11, 2021 at 2:45 am #

    Great advice. Liam and I have an addendum to our wills which sets out how things should be.

    Liked by 1 person

    • afish25 October 11, 2021 at 9:18 am #

      Sounds like you’ve had those conversations. And with your mother? I think it has to be an ongoing process. Things change. But you sound way ahead of the game.

      Like

  5. Kris Blaszcak October 11, 2021 at 6:00 pm #

    Good talk and important subject!

    Liked by 1 person

    • afish25 October 11, 2021 at 6:09 pm #

      Thanks for stopping by. I never know who reads my blog.

      Like

Hey hey what have you got to say!

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

Emilie Vardaman

travel and random thoughts

midwife87505's Blog

A great WordPress.com site

A Dead Kennedy

: A journal of a very slooow marathon swimmer

The Soulful Word

Intuitive copywriter + content creator: word whispering magic for lightworkers

View From Casita Colibrí

gringa musings from a rooftop terrace in Oaxaca

Your Hand in Mind

Musings of a human factors engineer after her brain was released...

Adventures with LoLo

PUERTO RICO: "Isla del Encanto”… "Island of Enchantment"

Our House In...

Living where we are

Surviving Yucatan

Smoothing out Mexico's rough spots.

A Boy and Her Dog

Traversing the Border between Butch and Transgender

Surviving Mexico

Adventures and Disasters

Just Another Moment in Paradise

Snippets of an Adventure's Life in Cozumel, Mexico

Perking the Pansies

Jack Scott's random ramblings

Mexico Retold

There's more to Mexico than meets the media

WordPress.com News

The latest news on WordPress.com and the WordPress community.

The Amazon Express

From the most distant source to the sea.

Biketrash Holiday

Adventures on Two Wheels!

%d bloggers like this: